How I’m raising my kids to challenge and question everything
Questioning the beliefs we grew up with is essential, but many of us think it’s best to wait until our kids are older to introduce doubt into their lives. We don’t want to influence them when they’re still so young and impressionable, right? Encouraging our children to challenge everything—and even teaching them how—is one of the most important things we can do to prepare them for success and a fulfilling life. How I’m raising my kids to challenge and question everything.
Point out how things could be better
To get our kids thinking outside the box, we must expose them to as many different opinions as possible. The best way to do this is by telling them to someone who opposes what they believe in. If you can’t find a friend or family member who disagrees with your viewpoint, it’s time to stop and think about what you’re teaching your children. We can all learn something new by talking with people who see the world differently than we do.
Tell stories from your own experiences
I want them to be able to come up with their own opinions, even if it means they don’t always agree with me. If they’re unsure what to do, I encourage them by asking what they would do. We then discuss the best course of action and how it will affect other people. The goal is for them to think critically before coming up with an answer.
Explain why you do what you do
I want them to have the tools they need to be a strong, confident person. I want them to know that they can be anything they want. But most importantly, I want them never to stop asking questions. Even if it’s just What is this? or Why do we say this? I want them always to be looking for answers. The world is complicated and messy – figuring out how things work is not easy. But the more they know, the more they’ll understand why things are so complex in this world.
Share ways they can make it happen in their lives
Here are some ways that we have tried to make sure our kids know that it’s okay to question authority:
- Engage in discussions with them about current events or problems in the world. We talk about what we think the root cause might be and what people are doing about it.
- Encourage them to ask questions whenever they don’t understand something at school, home, work, or social settings.
- Invite someone who is different from us into the house (i.e., a police officer) and discuss issues related to policing and race relations with them over dinner.
- Teach empathy by showing their own feelings on an issue by thinking of someone else who might feel differently on the topic (think: Trump supporters).
- Show them how powerful someone can be if they decide to speak up for what they believe in, whether in their school, workplace, neighborhood, etc.
Teach them to learn by exploring
I want them to grow up understanding that the world is a complicated place and that when we don’t know how something works or what something means, it’s okay. It’s actually more than okay. It’s an opportunity for us to explore and learn together. So often, as adults, we think that not knowing is a sign of weakness. But in reality, our ignorance can be our most powerful tool. The great thing about having children is they have no idea they’re ignorant; they haven’t had time yet to realize all the things they don’t know and understand their limits in this big world around them.
